89 Not Out: Day 36, Enid Blyton Goes Missing

S&C contributor and Pompey Politics Podcast host Ian Morris shares his experience of the lockdown, as someone with diabetes. It’s Day 36, and one of the household hasn’t come home, despite the, ahem, clear government guidelines for the lockdown.

Monday 20th April, Day 36 of 89.

Relief with a tiny bell. 

Today was a bloody long day, and not for the usual reasons of manic work or the endless tedium of lockdown life.

On Sunday night the smallest of our cats, Enid Blyton, didn’t come in. This isn’t unknown as we get into the warmer months but should she opt for a late night then whoever gets up for a wee in the, ahem, wee small hours is treated to a proper shmolocking. I can’t give you the exact origins of this word but it involves a very tiny cat standing on the drive and letting rip that she is only a poor, defenceless cat, and you have heartlessly locked her out of the house, it isn’t safe out here, and you should be ashamed. So you have to make yourself decent and go and let her in. 

As we got up for breakfast, there had been no shmolocking. Despite the offer of ‘din-dins’ in that voice – I’m not sure why we summon cats to eat in a voice that only dolphins and dogs can hear – alas, there was no small cat. Sir Arthur Kitten Doyle showed the appropriate levels of concern by scoffing her breakfast as well as his, and the waiting began. 

A search of the surrounding area yielded nothing. Facebook posts were made, and when a neighbour posted their cat had also gone missing last night, my overly wrought imagination began to fret about what might have happened. All cat owners fear the RTA (Road Traffic Accident), but with traffic down massively, surely not? 

Just after 5pm – known as the cup of tea hour during lockdown – little Noah was sure he could hear a bell on the drive. All work was abandoned as Tom and Nicky flooded from the house and there, stood on the garden wall was a  slightly dusty, and rather hungry little Enid blasting them for the fact that, whatever had happened, it was clear we had all failed to take care of our little cat as we should have done. 

As someone once said, ‘It’s kind of weird we like to share our houses with little stripy tigers’, and I  guess it is, but they are very much part of our family and the Morris household is mightily relieved that we are all back together. 

Enid Blyton (the cat, not the author). Image courtesy of Ian Morris.


Don’t miss Ian’s diary each day, keep an eye out for new entries here, along with past editions of the Pompey Politics Podcast. How are you managing the lockdown at the moment? Get in touch with us over on Facebook or Twitter and let us know your experiences and any hints and tips you’re finding helpful right now.

Image by Monica Rodriguez from Pixabay.

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