Picks of 2015 – Pompey Cultcha

Politicians Open Mouth - Stair Slide Space

This week we’re revisiting some of our best pieces from 2015. Today a handpicked selection of some of our finest fiction, poetry and culture pieces.

(c) William Sutton
(c) William Sutton

William Sutton – The Crème of Local Writing

“I recommend seeking out places locally owned and staffed. There are several reasons. Invest your pennies in local enterprises and enterprising locals, rather than bolstering faraway chains. Is buying a coffee really a political act? Yes: if you spend with multinationals, the money floats away elsewhere. Spend it local, keep it local. If you want such ventures to survive, buy from them and they will thrive.”

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Richard Williams – Bird in Hand

Abide with me and a sea of blue.

Wembley stadium and Kanu scores,

forty-something men so close to tears,

my daughters and I in our Pompey shirts.

The final whistle on a perfect day.

Doctor Manfratton

Jon Crout – Dr Manfratton: An Origin Story

“At a match in 2008 we are celebrating a belated centenary, actually marking 110 years, another chronal absurdity. I am on the cover of the programme. I pick this programme up from the dust of the old stadium ruins many years later. I look at the dirt stained picture of this unlikeliest of mascots and let it fall from my fingers. At half time of that same match, a steward explains that they want a word in private. There have been complaints. Some people are unhappy at their view being partially obscured by a big blue man. There are unsubstantiated reports that my aura is somehow affecting the taste of the pies.”

Lazlo

Laszlo Dumitrescu – Fresh off the Boat

“Straight away I see there are not so many differences between Romania and England. In Romania, you can still smoke in pubs; Government officials can be bribed with brandy and sausages; but my illusion of England as a place of good manners and respect has been shattered. I pick up your newspaper and I see that the BBC is controlled by child molesting gunoi. I wonder if my family would be better off in Romania. At least my children would have less chance of being molested.”

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Tess Foley – The Silent B: Greedy, Lazy and Confused

Is you is?

Is you ain’t? Oh you are? But you aren’t?

Tell you what, say you wink at the boys and I’ll lay down my lance,

Or say you bat lashes for girls and that’s fine,

But make up your mind.